JACOBS BIRTHDAY IS....

I made my date for the c-section. We are going to come home to muskegon and have my orriginal doctor deliver Jacob. The date is Thursday March 26, Dr. Mcdonald decided on doing it at 38 weeks because of my history. I dont know the exact time yet but at least we have a date. This is all contingent on making it that far. So far things look good other than high blood pressure, and im on medication for that. If i can stay healthy than I can go back and have him at home. I know that at any time i could turn and would have to be delivered here in Farmington Hills. But as of right now Im so excited and ready to see this little guy in a few weeks!!! I will keep you posted. I will be at Mercy Birthing Center off of Apple Ave. I will probably be there three or four days. Then we will head back here to Farmington Hills. Elaine has her BIG SISTER tee-shirt ready!! and almost everything is ready for him to come home. we just have to clean up his room and get diapers.

34

YEAH WE ARE 34 WEEKS!!!!! This is so exciting for us!! I feel huge and of course I have a much larger baby growing inside, around 5 pounds right now. I was put on some blood pressure pills last week. Labetalol. I hate being on them because I feel horrible, i get chills, shakes and get really tired. We did take the does down a bit from 400 mg to 200mg. hopefully it will help. I have not had any protein in urine and blood work is fine, my weight gain has slowed. Im actually the weight I was at 30 weeks when i delivered elaine. Only thing that was wrong was really high blood pressure, that is why they put me on the BP pill. Its not Ideal but having the high blood pressure is not good either. Today Josh came with to my appointment for moral support. We have decided that if the next 5 weeks go well that we want to deliver at home in muskegon. We got that ok today. So i have called my doctor at home to get somthing in the books. I will be 39 weeks on March 31. But with the blood pressure thing i may have to be delivered earlier. Im waiting for the Doctor to call me back. I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Im 80% confident that I will make it 5 more weeks. Ill just rest and do my best to keep him in. Next week they will start checking my cervix and all that fun stuff. One things I would love to have your prayers and comments if you want, is on getting my tubes tied. I have been struggling with this maybe for selfish reasons but non the less struggling. Given my history and all the times in and out of hospital I have been advised not to try again. And truthfully I dont want to. Im so emotionally drained that I dont know how to even handle my emotions at times. I feel horrible for putting Josh through all this, and Elaine whom for a while with all the changes refused to eat and her hair started falling out. Her way of dealing with stress. I was home and then not then home and gone again. I just dont think i can do that againwith two kids at home. I know some of it was me trying to handle the stress of moving away from everyone and everything familer to me. I on the other hand have always wanted a big family and would love to have had 4 kids but I really wanted 3. I feel weird that I will never have that chance again. It makes me sad. I pray daily about this sometimes more than that. I just want to feel confident about doing this procedure. If Im going to have it done I have to do it during the c-section because these are catholic hospitals and I have to have a medical reason to do it. Prayers and your imput would be wonderful. I just want to collect all the facts and make the right choice for our family.

Lainey and Josh are struggling with colds right now. Elaine has big green boogies and is all congested, its been a really lazy week around here. Josh is all stuffed up and not feeling well. This weekend will be sanitize weekend!! hopefully i dont get it, so far i feel fine. we are very eargly awaiting some warmer weather. its been so cold over here in Farmington Hills.

Random happenings from the Troasts

here are some of the things we have been up too the last month.

****Josh has been busy with work. Nothing new there

*** Josh is enjoying his new car 04 impala, so have I :)

**** Josh has been busy killing mice, i think there are gone now.

*** I joined a MOPS group and love it , Elaine however is going through seperation anxiety and cries alot. She also started doind this at church too.. they are held in the same building. sunday she cried and cried, settled down and started back up towards the end.

**** I burned my hand badly... i was heating up wax to do my eyebrows, i went to get container from microwave and i dropped it all over left hand. luckly no surgery needed, but i will have to keep it wrapped another week yet.. 3.5 weeks total. it was so painful.

*** I have a new insight on only having one hand to use. it is very difficult to do.

**** Im starting to have blood pressure rise. its been really high for about six days now. Of course my blood work is fine, i just turned in a 24 urine. i have a bad headache again and feeling very nauseated.

**** Elaine has been doing projects. she loves to color, paint and glue stuff.

**** I officially have the only 2 year old who refuses story time at library.. it was embarrasing today, every child was singing dancing and then listened to story... my child,,, ran around saying NOOOO GO FOR WALK. and then she left the room. i quietly picked up our stuff and left. so much for socializing. she would rather play alone. which is what we did. the library is huge with lots of stuff for kids to do.

***** Elaine has turned into a picky eater.

***** She is saying so much stuff. her language is really comming out.

*** She runs naked every night before bath, she loves it.

**** she cracks us up every day.. I thank God every day for her.

*** WE are slowly adjusting to life here... I still dont think of it as home.

The Snowman

I had another Doctor appointment today, everything looked really good. My blood pressure was the best it has been scince my very first pre-natal visit. My protein was negative and the baby sounds and looks good. I think im comming down with a headcold as my sinus's are all plugged up and i just dont feel good. But at least im doing well as far as the baby is concerned. I will be 31 weeks tommorow. YEAH!!! so I never mad it this far before so im experiencing things i have never had the joy:( of experiencing like braxton hicks... at least i hope thats what they are?? man alive, they are crazy!! and sorry for this one, but constipation!!! oh my gosh, i dont know what to take but its been really bad and hurts really bad. I have never had that before. I dont even want to go because I know the pain i will endure. Other than that I can feel he is getting bigger as his kicks and punches sure hurt and are getting stronger. He has also had the hick-ups alot. Im starting to get anxious to meet him and see what he looks like. Im starting to really gear up for the fact that I might just go full term with Jacob, but who knows?

Yesterday Elaine had a really off day, she decided to undress her self during her nap and then not go to sleep. She was literally going nuts, screaming crying, kicking and would not give in. So we let her get up, she was so naughty all day. It was so insane. She had something up her butt and it was not good. She had big bags under he eyes and would not give in to sleep. We all ended up going outside to play. Josh helped her make a snowman. It was so cute to watch them play. Norman kept running up and pulling the arms out of the snowman( they were sticks,so he could not help himself) Elaine went to hug the snowman when it was finished. We were able to spend almost an hour outside, its been a long time because the weather has been so terribly cold. Today is another nice day so we may go out again.

Josh watched the superbowl and we put Elaine to bed Early. We made snacks and I tried really hard to stay awake but at 9:30 I could not take it anymore. I really wanted to stay up and watch the one hour Office, but I was sleeping on the couch, so i just went to bed. I heard it was really good.

I have been feeling really down again lately. Im really missing life back in spring lake, so bad that it hurts sometimes. I want to see my friends, and go to story time at library, playgroup with early on, i want to go to the Journey, and be close to friends and family. I miss making random visits to Aunt Lisas classroom. I felt terrible that Josh for the first time had no-one to watch the super bowl with. I miss my breaks away from Elaine, so i can just be alone, We have not found any babysitters yet. Its starting to take its toll on both of us, as we just want to go on a date. we have not done that in forever. Sometimes I wish i could speed up time and skip all this Detroit living and get back to west michigan. I get so frustrated with myself, I have good days and then bad days. Im trying hard to remember God does things for a reason and I just wish I knew the reason. Elaine seems to be doing fine,except when we go to church she wakes up and we tell her its sunday and we are going to church, the first words out her mouth are Noah, Ellie, Emma,baby(which she uses for Eli) I have to tell her no, those friends dont go to this church, She says their names several times during the morning. She does like her new room and plays with new friends. Josh still seems to like his work, although I can tell he misses home too. I really hope spring brings about better overall feelings.